Hello Darlings, In many situations you’ll hear people advice that it’s not the situation it is your state of mind that carves out the outcome. While I’ve always been the one to take that advice with a grain of salt, lately I’ve been questioning as to how true it may be. In many situation whether personal or professional we are defined by our outlook. Over time our mindset becomes habitual as does the process in which we resolve problems.
Have you ever taken a moment to look back on a situation and think how could I have handled it differently? I’ve been doing that a lot lately. Looking back on your own responses can provide with answers that you’re looking for. Depending on how you handle unexpected situations or high stress demands will showcase what your attitudes are.
If you are easily irritated or angered, chances are you’re disadvantaging yourself but acting on impulse. Over number of years that I’ve had my business, I’ve finally learned to handle my responses; and boy, there were moments where I thought I was going to go ballistic. That is not to say that there are no moments where a break and react out of anger or frustration but 95% of the time, I have learnt to step back. Taking time and focusing on your frame of mind also adjusts your attitude towards a situation. In turn, makes you much better at dealing with a given dilemma as you have a perspective that is not based on impulse but rather reason.
Developing such a habit took years of practice and many failed attempts however now I can manage. Over the past year or so, I have been applying the same process to my personal life. Yes, when it comes to personal life a lot more emotions and feelings are involved making it that much more challenging. This aspect for me is still a work in progress. There are still moments when I need to physically distance myself either from the phone or the situation, so as not to mismanage it. When emotions are running high, things are often said and done that do not represent true side of the situation. Basically, you’re just being a b*tch for the sake of it. Best way to handled those outbursts is to simply retract, calm down and then logically evaluate the situation.
As I browsed StumbleUpon, I came across a quote by Buddha – “All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become.” In silence, I sat for a few minutes contemplating and wondering why in that moment that very quote stroke a chord with me. It was because in that moment where a million thoughts were running through my head which is exactly when we handle everything poorly. We are simply not focused.
As we’ve often heard in sports, it’s 90% mental and 10% physical and perhaps the same formula applies to life. How much of our life’s consequences are thought driven and how much of it can in fact we control? If athletes can train their minds to absorbs the high levels of stresses and competition, can the rest of us take a few tips and pointer on what it takes to truly put your mind to it. With sports aside, I am convinced that success is a direct outcome of your thoughts which in turn translate into action. Consciously or subconsciously the quality of thoughts shape our reactions and impulses. And once again as Buddha said, “Rule your mind or it will rule you.“
Regardless of whether you’re handling a work situation or a personal disagreement, always remember to manage your thoughts. In moments of weakness when you can’t, have the willpower to step away. Usually high stress situations present us with tunnel vision in which our opinion is the only one that matters. In that moment not being able to see a full picture from both sides can result in rushed decisions that can be disastrous. Just remember to be stronger than your thoughts, and step back. Both your personal life and your work life will benefit from your ability to manage your thoughts. That much I can promise.
Images by Arnold Lan